By Staci Layne Wilson
@StaciWilson

Young actor Tye Sheridan made his feature film debut in Terrence Malick’s beautiful, profound experimental drama The Tree of Life in 2011, and the following year saw his first leading role in the coming-of-age adventure, Mud. His other credits include the critically acclaimed Joe, and The Stanford Prison Experiment. And how does he follow up those notable films? With a lowbrow, beyond stupid, gory, gross-out amalgam of Porky’s and Dawn of the Dead called Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse.

Don’t get me wrong; I’m a fan of the zom-com genre. Shaun of the Dead, Zombieland, and Cooties all lumber to mind. I enjoy comedies too (though the smart ones are harder and harder to find; or at least ones without Jonah Hill or Seth Rogan in them). Sadly, Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse is the worst of both worlds. The fact that reviews are embargoed until opening days shows just how little confidence the studio has in this stinker.

The story, such as it is, centers on teenage Boy Scouts and BFF’s Ben (Tye Sheridan), Carter (Logan Miller), and Augie (Joey Morgan) – or, The Smart One, The Horny One, and The Chubby One. Toss in a hot, badass cocktail waitress (Sarah Dumont) who wields a shotgun better than Chuck Connors, the requisite crazy cat lady (Cloris Leachman), and a vain but well-meaning Scout leader (David Koechner) – mix them all up in a local lab experiment gone terribly wrong – and you’ve got a recipe for disaster.

The actors are good (can’t complain about any of the performances) and they do their best given the paper-thin characters they’re embodying. The zombie effects are nothing new (yawn), but at least the hordes seem enthusiastic enough in their bloodlust (gotta love “YOLO zombie”). Koechner is by far the best thing in the film, but in a way it’s sad he’s not getting better roles (check out his wonderful performance in Cheap Thrills for proof of my lament).

Director Christopher Landon’s background is in the horror and suspense genre (he wrote Blood and Chocolate, Disturbia and four of the Paranormal Activity franchise flicks), but this is his first attempt at comedy… and hopefully his last. He’s a talented fella, but this is clearly not his strong suit. The jokes and set pieces are old, stale, idiotic, and finally, baffling – because while the humor is aimed squarely at the crotches of 11-year-old boys who love fart jokes, dick humor, and toilet gags, Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse is rated R. Maybe they’re hoping for the VOD crowd and if that’s the case, save your money and wait for to be offended you in the comfort of your home.

No merit badge for Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse.

1 Hour  33 Minutes
Rated: R

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SCOUTS GUIDE TO THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE Review